"I Want to Date Younger" - Bat in Your League

[caption id="attachment_2962" align="aligncenter" width="595"] This is a fitness transformation photo (no relation to dating younger), but which version of him do you think a younger woman would prefer?
Photo credit: lifelevel10.extremebodyshaping.com[/caption]

Lots of men want to date younger women. They spend a majority of their younger years building wealth and becoming successful, then one day it hits them that they have no family to share all they have accomplished with. This happens to women as well, but less often due to their biological clocks. Usually, women who were busy in their younger years want a family at 40, while men suddenly want one in their 50s. This causes men to desire much younger women because women their age are done having children.

Today we are going to give men looking to date younger a few tips. If you are a really attractive older man with a killer personality who wants children, you could possibly date a woman 20 or more years your junior successfully. If you are an older man who wants to date younger, but you look like a traditional grandparent it will be much more difficult. This doesn't mean there is nothing you can do to make yourself more appealing to younger women.

Style is a BIG part of dating younger. If you dress like a grandfather, all she will see when she looks at you is her dear grandpa not a sexy man. There's nothing wrong with dating as a grandpa, but you don't have to look like one. Pick up a GQ magazine or thumb through some men's fashion catalogues for modern style ideas. You've got to compete with the men her age. Join a gym or get a trainer to get you in shape. Also, don't forget to invest in a good hairdresser to cover those grays and bring your hairstyle up to date.

It's all a matter of batting in your league. Brad Pitt is in his 50s and there are 20 somethings who would love to date him! He is fashion forward and in great shape. If Brad were out of shape and dressed like he was stuck in the 80s, the reach of his sex appeal would likely shorten a bit. Not saying you have to look like him, but at least try your best to get in shape and dress the part.

*This advice applies to women looking to date younger as well.

Good luck finding Mrs. Right!

One on One and Eight at Eight

Single Jingle Mingle Recap!

Johnny's Hideaway was overflowing with single Atlantans last night! It was definitely a night to remember as we danced the night away Sinatra style. The ladies of Eight at Eight and One on One were in their usual red dresses, so singles would know who to ask, when they wanted to be introduced to someone.

This was one of the few public events we hold, which added a twist for the matchmakers as they tried to pick up on who would be a good match for each other. With close to 200 singles, introductions were no easy feat, but several connections were made and the team is eagerly waiting to hear how they panned out!

We were excited to see many singles participating in our ugly sweater contest. The participants are below. The ugliest sweater won $100!

[caption id="attachment_2932" align="alignnone" width="595"] Not quite a sweater, but great effort from a handsome gentleman.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_2933" align="alignnone" width="595"] Cute ladies![/caption]

[caption id="attachment_2934" align="alignnone" width="595"] He actually wore the sweater for fun, but we wanted him to be in the contest.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_2931" align="alignnone" width="595"] Runner up and President Sarah Kathryn Smith![/caption]

[caption id="attachment_2935" align="alignnone" width="595"] WINNER! This ugly sweater really shined. There was a full gold confetti border and confetti back.[/caption]

If you could not make this fantastic event, we have a few photos for you below.



[caption id="attachment_2941" align="alignnone" width="595"] They were really grooving![/caption]



[caption id="attachment_2954" align="alignnone" width="480"] Get down, get down![/caption]



[caption id="attachment_2937" align="alignnone" width="595"] The end![/caption]

Would you like to attend our next holiday event? We are planning our next holiday party for February, in celebration of Valentine's Day! Like us on Facebook to stay in the loop.

Don't forget Eight at Eight throws weekly dinner parties for singles in Atlanta, DC, Chicago and New York.

Happy Holidays,

Eight at Eight and One on One

How to Have a Not So Lonely Holiday

The winter holidays are coming up quickly. Hanukkah ends today, Christmas is up next, the day after Christmas Kwanzaa begins, then the new year will be here, before you know it!

No matter which holiday you choose to celebrate, singles often suffer feelings of loneliness during the holiday season. Even if you are surrounded by family members, many times they'll make jokes about your singleness or ask when you are going to bring someone home for the holidays. Laugh it off and don't let these things get to you. The main way to have a lonely holiday is by thinking of it constantly. "Another year alone on Christmas..." "Another year without anyone to kiss at midnight on New Year's Eve..." Thoughts like this are not helpful and only making you feel more lonely.

Instead, do things you love to do. If you enjoy the outdoors, bundle up and take a peaceful hike on  a trail you have been meaning to try out. Love movies? Pop some popcorn, grab your favorite movie treats and have a movie night. The movies you choose don't have to relate to a holiday. Pick a few movies you have really been wanting to see, so you can have something to look forward to. Of course, not thinking about your loneliness is easier said than done. The key is to be active or engaged in something that takes your mind off of it. If you have family or friends you can spend time with try to plan activities with them, even if it's just a night of playing boardgames, while  drinking and laughing together.

The holidays are a great time to meet people. Usually, there are several singles mixers and other holiday events that you could attend to meet someone special. Think of the holidays as a time to meet someone, rather than a time to be lonely. Bowling alleys, bars, some retail stores, ice skating rinks, and a few other attractions are open on holidays. There is a lot more to do than mope around at home on the holidays. Get in the holiday spirit and enjoy your free time to do things you enjoy this holiday season.

We came across two insightful articles about surviving the holidays, enjoy!:

http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/44-tips-for-surviving-christmasthe-holidays-whether-youre-single-in-a-relationship-no-contact-or-broken-hearted/

http://www.askmen.com/money/body_and_mind_100/108_better_living.html

Warm regards,

One on One and Eight at Eight 

How a Second Date Should Differ from Your First

[caption id="attachment_2923" align="aligncenter" width="595"] Photo credit: www.nutritionaldesigns.com[/caption]

You made it through the first date and she accepted your request for a second one. Way to go! Now it's time to figure out if you really have chemistry. First-date chemistry is hardly ever based on much more than physical attraction. On your second date, you both will be more comfortable and more of your true personalities will come through.

DO NOT do a dinner date again. This time do something more active so you can see more personality from your date. Dinner is similar to an interview. You're just covering basic information to make sure you want to see her again. Your second date should help you get to know if her personality fits what you want. For instance, if you are an outdoorsy guy, ask her on a date to do something like fishing or hiking, then have a nice picnic. If a love of outdoors is a trait you really want in your partner, it's better to see it, rather than her telling you she "loves the outdoors."

Taking a class together is always a fun idea, especially if she mentions an interest in something in particular. Pottery classes, cooking classes, and painting classes are all fun  to do together. When going on active dates, you're making memories and learning about each other. Is she impatient with the instructor (uh oh!)? Is she gentle with the clay? Does she put your chopping skills to shame or are you going to need to offer to do the cooking?

What you learn about her will differ based on what activity you choose, but you will still learn much more about your date by doing things with her and seeing her in a state where she doesn't feel confined to generic dinner conversation.  Active dates will allow her to learn about you too, allowing you both to determine if you are a good match.

The weekend is right around the corner. Make this date a fun one!

Until next time, good luck!

One on One and Eight at Eight 

He Treats Me Like We're in a Relationship

[caption id="attachment_2918" align="aligncenter" width="500"] Photo credit: www.womensday.com[/caption]

Is the guy you are dating treating you like you are in a relationship, but does not want to give you the title? There are a few possible reasons for this.

1. He's Not that into You: "Wait, he calls me and takes me out all the time!" That's great, but it's probably because you are always available and he's bored.  Make yourself a little less available and pay attention to how he reacts. If he doesn't use a little effort to speak to you or see you, he was using you to avoid boredom. If he actually tries to work with your "schedule," congratulations! You are more than a time killer. He's into you. If he is still introducing you as a friend months into dating, talk to him about how it makes you feel. Have you two had "the talk" to clarify your relationship? It's time.

2. He Has Commitment Issues: In this case, he likes you, but he is afraid to commit for some reason. To figure out the difference between commitment issues and him not being into you, ask him questions. Don't be whiny about it, but figure out where his head is. If he says something along the lines of, "I like you, but I'm just not ready for a serious relationship," you will need to decide if he is worth waiting for. Be sure to get to the bottom of why he doesn't feel ready. If he is fresh out of a long-term relationship, he may really need time. If he hasn't been in a serious relationship in a while, he may just have commitment issues...red flag!

This is especially a red flag, if he always has an excuse for not wanting a relationship. The worst excuse is "I'm too busy." There has only been one unwed U.S. president. It's safe to assume the presidents were busy trying to get the experience they needed to one day rule the free world, but they still had time to date and find a wife along the way. People make time for who they want to see.

3. He Likes You the Most, but there are Others: "It's not cheating, if you're not in a relationship right?" He likes you the best, but he needs to be sure there isn't anyone better out there. Unfortunately, our society has socialized us to always look for the next best thing. This is an unhealthy idea to bring to dating, but both men and women do it nonetheless. Talk to him about how you feel. He may say, "I like you, but I just want to explore my options." Often, the way to handle a situation like this is to casually date other men and be as open about it as he is about dating other women. If he starts getting agitated, explain to him you want to be with him, but he has been busy exploring his options. His reaction will let you know whether you should keep exploring your options too or not.

***Remember not to nag! Try to discuss the situation in a light-hearted way or someone else may start looking like a better option than you.

These are just a few reasons he may be treating you like you are in a relationship with him without actually referring to you as his girlfriend. Clear communication is key in determining whether you are wasting time or if you just need a little patience. Refusal to communicate or trivial excuses can be a strong signal you are wasting time.

Until next time, good luck!

One on One and Eight at Eight

Having Perseverance on Your Journey to Love

[caption id="attachment_2909" align="aligncenter" width="595"] Photo Credit: www.worth1000.com[/caption]

Sometimes finding love takes a long time. It stinks not knowing when it is going to happen, but you have to have  perseverance and remain confident enough to know it will happen. Don't let your enthusiasm waiver and don't compare your journey to love to your friends'. Everyone's journey is their own.

This post is inspired by four One on One Matchmaking clients who were engaged last month. One of the female clients met her fiancé on her 1st  date and the other met her fiancé on her 15th date. You never know when it's going to happen, but as long as you are trying, it will!

Think of finding a life partner as finding your dream job. You are going to go on lots of interviews and not a get a few of the jobs. Of the jobs you do get, you are not going to love them all, so you will leave...until you find the job that seems like the perfect fit and worth staying at forever.

Don't get discouraged when budding relationships end. Be happy you have an opportunity to find something better.

Until next time, good luck!

One on One and Eight at Eight 

The Reason She Says She is "Just Looking for Friends"

[caption id="attachment_2904" align="aligncenter" width="595"] Photo Credit: gatewayoflife.wordpress.com[/caption]

Lately, it seems we have been getting more and more men complaining about women at singles events, meant for meeting someone to date, claiming they are there to "make friends." We're going to give it to you straight fellas. She is there to make friends, when it comes to YOU. That doesn't mean she isn't looking for a relationship...especially, if she is at a singles event meant to help her find one.

This is a nice way of saying she isn't interested. We always encourage women to be honest when they are not interested in a guy, but sometimes they just don't have it in them to tell you.

This doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you. You just may not be her type. Move on to a woman who is looking for a relationship...with someone like you.

Until next time, good luck!

One on One and Eight at Eight