Bored Dating!?

Are you OVER dating?  Lately, a few clients have mentioned that they are just feeling down and out about dating in general.  Sometimes you can wear yourself out by dating too much, cramming dates into an already hectic schedule, or just going on bad date after bad date!

I came across this posting about how to bring the FUN back into dating and thought I would share it with you!                  READ IT HERE!

Online Dating Uncertainty

Being Matchmakers, we support all kinds of dating tools that will get you out there meeting people. We even support online dating, however it does have its drawbacks.



Everyone always has that twinge of doubt or worry that the person they "hit it off" with via an online site is not who they say they are.  Are they really single? You would be surprised the number of people that tell us that "found someone" online but later found out that the person was a jackass married, going thru divorce, or was in a relationship of some sorts! WTH?!

This is a huge turn off - not just to the lying party but also to online dating! I came across this site that addresses this issue!

Zidelity- the website screens out any individuals registered on dating sites who are already in relationships! WHAT!!!!?   It is like a safe "zone"  for the two interested parties to build trust.  As a user, you can control how much privacy  you want. If you are signed up, you cannot change your relationship status or other important information without the other knowing about it. The only issue is that both parties have to be registered.

So, in summary, if you hit it off with someone via internet dating, ask them to sign up on Zidelity with you (it is free).  If they don't have anything to hide, the should have NO PROBLEM doing this- Right?!

Click HERE to learn more about Zidelity!

Talking Points

Before going on a date, there's always a checklist of things to have done: nails, hair, outfit, etc. When it comes to the topics of conversation, I've always been a little nervous of the right moves. I'm really outgoing... but that can backfire. Am I oversharing? Do I seem interesting? Should I be more quiet? But, I've found a couple things that can help ease anxiety before an exciting date!

-First: relax, you've done this your whole life.

Meeting new people has been something you've done your whole life. Classmates, professors, employers, friends... They are all people whom, over time, you've developed relationships with. Just because it's a date doesn't mean that it has to be something scarier than just meeting someone new!

-Don't lay it all out on the table.

For people like me, it can be tempting to feel like oversharing... He talks about something interesting and you have a great story that ties along perfectly. If it's something really worth mentioning-- sure, go ahead... but if it feels like you're just trying to find something to say to fill in the space, resist! It's natural to have lulls in conversation during a date.... fight to urge to ramble.

-Just because he asks, doesn't mean he needs to know it all.

So, he asks why you haven't been taken already or why you're still single... that doesn't mean to give your life story. Keep private things private.. It should be a privilege to get to know you better; there's something to be said about getting to know someone slowly!

But, if you know your nerves are going to be through the roof- try to squeeze in a great workout beforehand, it  can calm your mind and your nerves. Above all, try to have fun!  If you're having a good time, it'll be sure to show through.

 

Good luck!

To send or not to send...

With all the technology we have at our fingertips, it’s no question that “bedroom material” has made it’s way out of the bedroom and has found itself right in those gadgets we love so much.  This convenience is great for hard-working, professional couples but can really land you in hot water if you’re not careful.

A friend of mine.... let’s call her Leah, had been in the middle of a steamy texting conversation with a guy she was casually seeing. When she put the brakes on the relationship a couple days later, it only took a few clicks for him to send out some of those racy pics to 200 of his closest friends.  By the end of the day, most of Leah’s friends had seen.. most of Leah.  Rough lesson. So, before you decide to send out that R-rated text, remember these guidelines:

-Don’t sext what you wouldn’t say in person! 

It can be easy to be bold behind that touchscreen, but be weary! If you wouldn’t say it out loud, you probably shouldn’t text it. When in doubt, DO NOT SEND!

-Don’t sext if you haven’t... sexed. 

Talking a big game before the big game can go wrong in a lot of ways: wrecking your nerves, ruining that first time, and potentially ending something that could’ve worked.  Avoid, avoid, avoid.

-Be weary of pictures

Like my poor friend Leah, who knows what each person did after they received THAT pic.  Pictures can be uploaded to the internet so quickly it’ll make your head spin and once it’s there, it can be impossible to completely remove it.  Trusting someone you don’t totally know with pictures of you in your birthday suit can really end up hurting you emotionally, professionally, and mentally.  Don’t set yourself up for heartbreak!

Above all else, guard yourself and be smart!  Once you’re in a committed relationship, texting can be a great tool for those long business trips or to spice up the day, but if you don’t feel 100% about pressing send... don’t do it.

How can you get past "Friends with Benefits"

(Check out our more recent, useful post about this >>here .)

Friends with benefits - harmless, right?  I don't know of one time this situtaion has ended in peace.  I would say 99.9% of the time someone gets hurt.

It is hard to have this "fun/close" relationship with someone and not eventually want more...or get jealous when they start seeing someone else seriously.

I came across this article and thought it was a great answer to this girls question of  "how do I make him want more than friends with benefits".

Read about it HERE!  ENJOY and Happy Friday!

Break-up Playlist

Lets face it, sometimes getting over a break-up can take a while.  Months or weeks go by of moping around in dirty pajama's, drowning yourself in ice cream & chocolate, and not showering.

Sometimes life don't give us the luxury of taking our time to morn the loss of the lost love and you just gotta pull yourself together.  Or maybe, you just wanna be OVER IT!

Here is an article with the top break-up songs.  Download a few of these and get OVER IT!

When is the right time??

Have you ever found yourself in a new relationship wondering when is the right time to do the deed?

Sometimes waiting too long can make the other feel unsure of where you stand or put you guys in the friend zone.  However, sometimes having sex too soon complicates things resulting in a break-up.  Uft, as if you need more pressure on the relationship plate !

So...how do you get the timing right?!   I personally feel that this is a touchy subject and honestly I think the real answer is based on you as an individual.  I did come across this article and thought I would share it with you guys.

Read it HERE!